On similies and song lyrics.

I listen to the radio. The local pop station.

Perhaps that's my first mistake.

Because a few days ago, I was driving to work. As many of you know, I have a severe affliction that causes me to actually listen to song lyrics. For whatever reason, I wasn't really paying attention that day. It's likely I was thinking of something else, something mindless and silly, like an argument for a motion to suppress, or a series of questions for a killer cross.

And then I heard it. The dulcet tones of American Idol winner Jordin Sparks telling me:

You’re still a part of everything I do.
You’re on my heart just like a tattoo.
Just like a tattoo.
I’ll always have you.

I mean. Really-

I mean-

I-I-I-I-

I'm speechless.

Seriously?

What the fuck is that lyric? (I try not to swear here, but I'm really at a loss on this one.)

I'm going to ignore the fact that the song makes no sense. It was as if someone strung some words together that happened to rhyme. And when the songwriter couldn't come up with a rhyme? Well, nothing rhymes with "you" better than another "you." And the rhyme for "moment"? Surely, "broken" was perfect! Yeah, I'll ignore the lack of meaning and ridiculous rhyming. For now.

But, shit, come on, man. We are now comparing the permanency of love to the permanency of a tattoo? You know, that is damned near poetic. Because when I got my tattoo... well, let's just say it wasn't one of my better moments. I'm a tad regretful now that I'm no longer twenty-one. So I have no issue comparing that stupid mistake to, oh, the love I thought I felt for some ex-boyfriend.

In case you weren't paying attention earlier, let's recap:

Bad radio station.

Jordin Sparks.

You’re on my heart just like a tattoo.
Just like a tattoo.

I don't even have anything to say.

Please put me out of my misery.