Don't use Bank of America.

Let this be a recommendation not to use Bank of America.

I was formerly a BankBoston customer. Which then got bought by Fleet. Which was then bought by Bank of America. My primary checking account is t an online checking account that bears an interest rate of over 4%. I still maintain my Bank of America account so that I can deposit my house-mate's rent check without having to mail it in. That is the only thing I use it for. However, to avoid a maintenance fee, I need to keep a balance of $750 in the account. While I can do this, I find it annoying.

So. I decided to see if there's any way I can reduce my minimum balance without paying a maintenance fee (which is ridiculous, really; they're the ones making money by holding my cash; I get little out of it). I saw a Special Offer(!) on the web site. For a Limited Time Only, Bank of America was waiving the service fee on a different account that did not require a minimum balance.

Awesome. I called and switched.

Then I read the fine print. And called back.

As it turns out, in order to waive the fee, one needs to have at least one monthly direct deposit into the account. Unless, of course, one opens the account online. 'Cause it's an Exclusive Online Offer. Which, as I mentioned, is for a Limited Time Only. I don't do direct deposit on that account; it goes into my online interest-bearing account.

So I called back. And confirmed that they are, indeed, assholes.

Me: So you're telling me that your existing customers have to pay the fee, while new customers do not?

Phone Rep: Well, it is a promotional offer.

Me: Well, switch my account back. Which I will be closing next week.

Phone Rep: Sure. Is there anything else we can help you with today?

Don't use Bank of America.

I'll keep you posted on who has better deals.