"Why I need a spinal tap." Or, "Lenscrafters be damned!"

Back in September, LensCrafters send me a coupon. A huge discount on new frames. Fifty percent off lenses. Yay! Since my glasses are more than two years old, and my visions seems to be a tad blurry in one eye, I went in for an eye exam, and to purchase some new specs.

I got my eye exam, and the optometrist told me that the prescription in my left eye was actually a bit higher than it needed to be. So she wrote up a new prescription. Then she told me that she saw something a bit worrisome in the back of my eyes and wanted to dilate my pupils.

I had never had my pupils dilated before. I get squeamish when it comes to eye drops. Also, I've always been extremely sensitive to light. But because I live only two minutes from LenscCrafters, and because the optometrist was insistent, I reluctantly agreed.

The dilation threw my balance off, and I had to drink a lot of water to keep from throwing up. (Please note that ever since I punctured an eardrum more'n a decade ago, I am particularly affected by anything that has the potential to throw my balance off.) Twenty minutes after the drops went in, I was back in the chair getting lights shined in my eyes.

After that, the optometrist wanted me to take visual fields test to check my peripheral vision.

I failed.

The eye doc sat me down again and explained that she was concerned. I had inflamed optic nerves, the likes of which she had learned about, but never seen. Even more distressing to her what that I seemed to have huge blind spots in my peripheral vision. She referred me to a neuro-opthamologist (there are only two in the state), and wrote him a letter herself.

Last week, I had my appointment. I was given more tests, and my visual fields were tested yet again. And again, I failed. The doc dilated my pupils again and told me the same thing: Inflamed optic nerves. However, he told me my case was "interesting."

"Most patients I have with inflamed optic nerves present with different symptoms," he explained. "They have intense headaches that last for three days. Debilitating headaches with headaches. They also have loss of vision for up to a minute at times. You don't seem to have any of these symptoms."

Right. So what was wrong?

Doc told me that what I have is most likely a congenital defect that I've always had; no one had ever noticed before. The fact that I never noticed a loss of peripheral vision means I've probably always had huge blind spots. The defect is called optic disc drusen. It is un-treatable, yet harmless. However, there is no way to diagnose it.

No way to diagnose it, that is, except for ruling out anything else it could be. Like stuff that would cause pressure on my spinal chord. Like tumors.

Hence the MRI and spinal tap.

Damn, you LensCrafters!